The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

There is a story we hear, when all of us are very young still...I am certain everyone has heard it somehow as it has spred though out the ages. Weither it be fox, or frog, somehow it is always the same. The scorpian and the promise never to let his sting bite down on the other. Helping him across the river. But in the end? His promise fails, and his stinger stings the helper one way or another....and they both sink. Both drowning to their deaths...and as they both are sinking? The Frog, or the Fox...whichever it is asks "Why did you sting me? Now we will both die" And the scorpian tells him simply in return, "I can not help it...Its my nature"



Then why do I feel like the scorpian right now?



"It is only my nature" Will not work here.

What was said??????



I do not know. What I do know is that my prince is upset about somethings and I am probably to blame for it...somehow. My foolish mistake. Only upon returning did I realize, I left in a river of tears without watching my step.



You should always watch your steps, living in a house of coiled snakes. Coiled snakes just waiting to snap on unsepecting. Melissa must have over heard part of my converstation with Ash ealier and said something...has to be it. After last night of course she would just be waiting for a chance to snap and ruin something pressious to me. But what was said? Why did he leave so sudden? As soon as I walk in the door even from trying to clear my head. Just my luck...



Today couldn't have gone any better....(note the ovious sarcasim)



I didn't get to meet with Kei, now another person dear to me seems to be angery. Or Upset. They are relitively the same thing.



And to think...I thought it would be a good day today, where I could just forget...everything...once. Like I use to back in the old days with my lion beside me.

Disillusions...the things humanity seems to comfort themselves in. Funny how this city makes one think of such things.



Everywhere else in the world Vegas is seen as the eturnal 'sin city'. The place everyone gets away with it. I myself probably thought so just as much too, once. Now that this city is my home, I feel strangely comforted when it is blanketed in darkness. When I am hearing the sirens off in the distance, listening as if death were slowly approching. Don't get me wrong. By all means I do not intend to make this city a final resting place. It is just funny how you never seem to know much about a place until you go there. Face to face, so t speak. And come to find out...facing a person can be a heck of a lot scarier then facing a city.



My time here is almost ending...



Soon I will be forced to leave for one reason or another....even if I do manage to find my way back eventually nothing will ever be the same anymore.



Then again...could all just be the full moon finally taking its tole on this already sleep deprived mind.



Its nearing sunrise...even though the beauty of the moon is still shining, with all of its glory. It is time for rest. My prince will kill me for managing to stay up so late again.

I wish there was a way I understood my own feelings. In a way...I am darkness. I am the night, and all of its beauty...the sounds of a thousand night falls in summer when I was far away from the world I live now. The city streets filthy, and the nighttime unforgiving. But alas, almost constently I find myself wondering...who is this person? What draws myself to another....or to place...or thing. Darkness in this place seems overwelming to me now. The city streets blurr into memories I do not wish to recall. Conversations I have had with strangers I will never see again, or if I do they will not remember my face. Nor I remember them. Visions of the Day light crossing time, and heat washing over paled skin from years of neglecting to show itself to the sun....unplesent the reminders.

When we move away...out on our own we think it is all of the bad memories we leave behind. The emotions we do not wish to deal with....or the time we do not wish existed at all. Turning back the clocks inside our own minds but never to out run them. Instead the coil themselves around us. Digging deeper and borrowing itself within us farther just waiting for the day to show up...like an unwanted visitor. Then you realize it was never gone anywhere else all along. You never have a chance to out run what is already within you.

Just every once in awhile...you run into an emotion or a memory of love and hope or light...and you want to hold onto it. And like the bright lights of the city, cutting through the darkness of the deepest night....it makes you feel warm inside.